Friday, 7 August 2015

A Not So Tiny Miracle...


Anyone who has known me for some time knows that I am a complete sewing/ craft tragic. My lack of skills and talent in these areas are the stuff of family legend. Anything that doesn't involve paints, brushes, pens or art processes and I am in trouble. I can sometimes stretch my skills to ceramics and am known for slightly wonky pots on my best day, but in an odd twist I am scarily adept with a set of lino tools. Any time I have a knife or scissors in my hand I am a chance of losing a limb, but those sharp little blighters are putty in my hands. If you really want to talk horror movie style debacles though we need to talk sewing. In my hands it is a bloodsport... we are talking brawl at the ice hockey level injuries and I have been known to need a half box of band aids, an ice pack, large alcoholic beverages and a good lie down after attempting a button.


With all of that in mind you can imagine the level of fear and horror that struck me when I realised the panels I had been happily crocheting would have to be attached together. I watched youtube videos on attaching them via crocheting, but my skills are still at that enthusiastic beginner stage and as I had sort of freestyled the whole thing and they didn't fit too neatly together that seemed like it was way beyond me... so I decided to sew the thing... I mean how hard can it be, a darning needle is bloody huge, and I can even thread the sucker without changing glasses. I happily announced to Phantom that I was attempting this feat, which prompted her to make a huge bucket of tea, grab some snacks, and settle in for the "show" as she called it. After about ten minutes the funny bugger disappeared and reappeared with bandaids, bandages, and a makeshift sling, and just lay them on the table while giggling like a maniac... soooo hilarious... Phantom then had a stage of commentating the whole process like it was sports channel event, which led to me declaring all sorts of creative threats to her skinny, smart arse little self... and they must have been dire because she retreated and left me to my mumbling and sewing frenzy.


In the end all expectations of blood being spilled were dashed, and I managed to attach all of the panels and remain bodily in tact. It is a not so tiny miracle, and while I would like to declare myself a competent sewing person, it is pretty much like my crocheting... gloriously half arsed and openly dodgy in the extreme. By the time it was done I was exhausted like I had run a marathon, I had an epic hand cramp. I had consumed my body weight in tea,I was mumbling incoherently, and had crazy eyes happening, but it was complete. Phantom, the cheeky bugger then swooped and stole the bloody thing and it has been on her bed ever since. Those are her little skinny chicken leg ankles sticking out the bottom of it. It is magnificently dodgy in places, and gloriously colourful, but I have to say it will be some time before I attempt another that will require sewing... 

I am going to stick with paint for a while
happy painting all...xx

36 comments:

My name is Erika. said...

Came out fantastic. Who knows what else you may be moving onto in the future? Stained glass? Metal smithing? Furniture building? Have a great weekend.

Jennifer McLean said...

You have done an absolutely beautiful job Trace. I'm so proud of you for doing something new and absolutely killing it. Good job my friend. From an old crocheter, I can see that beautiful texture created by posted stitches. You did great. YAY!! I'm a little jealous of Phantom. She's a lucky girl. :o) (Mom's clapping in the background and even took a break from watching our election debates going on now).

Lynn Cohen said...

Very pretty afghan Tracey. Glad you got from A to Z safely!

Helen Wilding said...

I absolutely love the rug and can easily see why it was stolen!

mandysea said...

Ahahahaha! I felt like I went on a journey with you!!!! Such a funny post for someone like me who 'thinks in pictures'!! I had the whole think running like a film in my head!
NEVERTHELESS, you've created this amazing blanket - its fabulous!!! And your little band-aids with dots of sprayed blood - weeeeell, beautiful in form, but hilarious with its intention!

Denyse Whelan. said...

Love it! The story & the colourful rug. Add skill to CV stat!

Giggles said...

Beautiful, a fantastic first blanket if I do say so myself! Love the bright fun colours! So glad she loves it! You need to give yourself a huge applause because I know exactly what went into that! Piles of work, long sessions and loads of love! All worth the amazing treasure Phantom will love forever! Oh and glad no one lost a digit!

Hugs Giggles

Ayala Art said...

I wish the post were not so funny, I cannot even feel sorry for your ouchies! lol
The end results is beautiful!

froebelsternchen Susi said...

fab blanket - great colors!

sirkkis said...

Gorgeous!
Happy weekend to you

Möwe von der Insel said...

I love it!
It was not very long ago that you've started to crochet, and
you've made such a huge thing! :))
Love the colours and the way you've put the blocks together :)
I guess you've done the blanket while the others played with the
machine during your holidays :)) If I would have started something
like this I wouldn't be half way done by now.
It's too boring for me :))

Have a beautiful day and weekend Tracey!
And thank you for your lovely visit :))

Möwe

Sandy said...

I love the bandaids the story and your wonderful crocheted rug.. Well done and of course she swooped in and took it look at the colours it is terrific.
Happy PPF
Sandy :)

rosy durand said...

bravo,

Neesie said...

What a laugh Trace, and thankfully a happy ending to this humongous feat! I don't know where to start... that blanket has had a life already and will be loved for years and years to come. No wonder Phantom took it because it will constantly feel like she's having a hug from you when she snuggles beneath it. It's gorgeous and to think no-one was harmed in the making!
Love the photo of the legs too... so cute.
I must admit when I saw your blood plasters I thought... oh my... what's happened, so I'm relieved all's well. By the way, I've never seen plasters look so good!
Take care and revel in your success for now. Maybe take up a more sedate activity for a while... no need to push or put yourself in harm's way.
xoxo

Julia Dunnit said...

It's a triumph! The thing that strikes me most is that your passion for art transcends everything...the colours in this blankie are just fab! I am a crochet them together gal...I think ultimately it's the same amount of work and hand cramp!!

Nic McLean said...

I love it!! and I don't blame phantom for pinching it for herself. You've really made me want to revisit my new year's resolution of 2013 to learn to crochet - I so want to be able to make big blankets like that. I'm glad that no harm befell you on sewing it all together but love the blood speckled plasters you painted in expectation!!

Julie Huston said...

Love the blanket.

Stacey Vadaj said...

wonderful colors and non pattern. love it.

Faye said...

Wow, Trace, you have exceeded all expectations with the marvelous needlework "throw". The colors are gorgeous and it looks like everything went together perfectly.. I love the illustration of the bandaids and drops of blood. So glad you didn't have to paint those from life!

SLScheibe said...

Wow, it looks beautiful and so bright and cheery! I love colourful blankets. I think it's a great success, blood and band aids aside. :)

Niki said...

Glorious blanket! You are very brave to tackle something so large as a first project. It turned out great, hope you continue to enjoy crocheting. I have to admit, I avoid projects requiring me to sew them together. I'm better at the making part than the finishing part.

rose of Walk in the Woods, LLC said...

Wonderful art, wonderful story, wonderful quilt... and totally awesome sense of humor!

As always. :D

Penny Lee StewArt said...

Beautiful Blanket and great illustration. If you finish a project, you are a WINNER! and this is definitely a blue ribbon day for you.

Rita said...

I love, love, love it! So fun and colorful. Good job. I like to crochet but can't manage to finish anything I start - unless it's a scarf...but how many scarves does a girl need?

Debo Shree said...

Ohhhhh... Its awesome.... 😃

Carol said...

It looks GREAT!!!!!!! I love the bright bold colors and the black edging ♥♥♥♥♥ Very good for a beginner! I have been an avid crocheter since grade school and have attempted to teach several people how to crochet so I know what I"m saying when I say "YOU DID GOOD!" LOVE the band-aide painting :)

Liz said...

Now you have me wanting to get out my crochet hool. Beautiful work with gorgeous colours!

Best wishes,
Liz

Lynn Richards said...

I am thoroughly impressed!!!! Just even to crochet is a major miracle to me. I attempted to learn this-once and only once. I thought it was best to put it all away after talking myself out of throwing the whole lot out the window while my teacher was patiently explaining to me how to crochet something....

Wanda said...

What a special blanket. Beautiful. Your bandaids are so realistic. Great post and narrative.

Studio Kaufmann said...

Love your crocheted blanket!! Yeah I hate sewing too. I usually just crochet the squares of a blanket together but like you say you had to just go for it with the needle. Happy PPF and happy sewing and swearing !!

Studio Kaufmann said...

Yeah whenever I am sewing I am swearing a lot too. And what about crossstitch those tiny holes and you have to chance cotton all the time. NIGHTMARE!! I love to crochet it is so easy and you can't stab yourself. Love your blanket. Happy PPF

LeeAnn@Encouragement Is Contagious said...

The ouchie was certainly worth the end result . Your crocheted blanket is gorgeous Tracey!

Michellem said...

Your afghan is amazing - not only colorful but practical as well - smart girl that Phantom swiping it for her own devices!!

ZenziB said...

No wonder Phantom stole it. It's perfectly delightful and you are bound to feel good with those lovely colors embracing you! Love it! You are quite the talent Tracey.

Miss Marple said...

simply gorgeous! Happy PPF - Irma

Sandra Busby said...

Well hats off to you because I can't even sew a button on!!! All that fiddly needle work would send me screaming, but you seem to have done a fab job - which must be why Phoebes nicked it!! :0)