Friday, 24 October 2014

Freak Out Week ...

The problem with finishing treatment for breast cancer
 is that now I have to start living up to all the bloody deals I made with myself
you have so much time on your hands feeling lousy 
 that you make all sorts of grand plans of what you are going to do post treatment
which is not a bad thing
after all how often do we get time away as an adult to stop and think about what we are doing and how we want to live
it is a rare thing and is also this awesome opportunity
but then you have to start living up to the promises you made to yourself
and that can lead you to a week
 that has you longingly drawing cocktails during breakfast on a Thursday

so this has been a bit of a snapshot of my week...

freak out that it is gaining followers steadily
and feel like I have to be less half arsed and become professional all of a sudden
this is trumped by my natural half-arsery and I then only put up a few posts
so feel comfortably back in my haphazard comfort zone

start to put together some stuff for the online shop
realise it is going to require me to organise the pit of a draw where I keep finished work
which makes me have a mild anxiety attack so figure I will sort the online stuff first
spend an hour achieving nothing
other than reinforcing my belief that I may in fact be tech dyslexic 
freak out completely that no one would want to buy prints and things
and promptly drink 4 cups of tea and twenty squares of chocolate to calm myself
and achieve absolutely nothing... nada... zip
except for being well fuelled with tea and chocolate

I also managed to procrastinate my arse off by doing all those necessary things like
alphabetising some cd's, not all of them mind... just about a third
stacking all the food mags that I want to go through into a teetering pile
then didn't touch one of them
I even mopped the bloody floors and I hate mopping an inordinate amount
but then I decided to jump back in
 after all I can't wimp out on all those plans that I made in the middle of the night while thoughtfully stroking my baldy head

so next I decide to start planning some classes in more detail
and spend 2 hours trying to round up the different notebooks that have all the ideas in them
I swear those notebooks are sick sadists who like to torture me 
by hiding and moving when I am not looking
and yes one notebook would make more sense
but let's just remember who we are talking about here... 

thinking of classes reminds me I am teaching at a class next year
so I decide it is time to film the teacher interview for Soul Food
and freak out at seeing myself on screen
that last half eyebrow really doesn't want to come in I have to say
try again and freak out when the dog sneaks in and licks my leg
causing me to use an expletive that is not very Soul Food appropriate
the next try is interrupted by a yelp and cry from the dog
which is due to him heading to the back yard and being rushed by a rogue scrub turkey
that mysteriously has taken up residence in our yard at odd times
saving the little leg licker from the creepy turkey
 was followed by a sneezing fit two minutes into the next try
the next version ended up being shot at a tilt
then I got a bit handsy and excited and spilt a cup of tea on myself
and finally another expletive moment when the dog revisited licking my foot
at which point I decided to give it a rest for another day


At this point it is Thursday morning
and I decide it is time to give myself some painting time
which resulted in the cocktail page above which magically calmed my brain
and after a solid day in the studio creating the paintings in this post
my brain was functioning enough for me to actually get some things achieved

So the achievement is that I have most things in place to do a big relaunch of
or maybe Wednesday... no let's go with Tuesday
starting the project back up was one of the biggest promises I made to myself during treatment and I am actually doing it
so pop by next week and check it out... there is a very cool giveaway involved
happy painting all...xx


Unknown said...

Sounds like an awesome week of getting things done! I'm proud of you Trace.

Michellem said...

I LOVE Cuppa With Friends (and it isn't just because you painted my cuppa) - LOVE that you are thinking of hosting your own class - go ahead and sign me up now. . .

Patricia said...

Yay!! The CUPPA project is coming back!! And classes? CAN't wait to hear more about that! Despite the spilled tea, sounds like a fab week!! Go you!

Helen Campbell said...

What a week! It's good to know that painting a cocktail has similar effects to that of drinking one. Which due to your busy schedule could be advantageous. I'll have to give it a go. :)
Happy PPF!

Belinda Basson said...

Thanks for sharing your week, makes me feel more normal. Like I am not the only one with tea stained clothes and many interruptions during the things I need to get done well which makes me do them badly, if at all...The fact that a day in your studio being creative makes the world right is what works for me too, I think us creatives are not meant for admin, though it is a necessary evil to survive in the real world. And as for those notebooks...I live in a Bermuda Triangle of my own making which looses things, usually the scissors or paintbrush I have just used, but can't find on my desk 5 min later...and I have not moved from my desk so they have to be there SOMEWHERE...

Faye said...

Sounds like a week we all have had. I love your drawings, Tracey, and I'm so glad you are feeling up to doing these sketches and paintings. You are a real inspiration.

Laila said...

You never fail to make me smile, not to say laugh. I love it, and if it weren't for my morning cuppa all would be fine. Now I'll have to go find some paper towels. Have a lovely weekend.

Valerie-Jael said...

Sounds like a great week! Lovely artwork. Valerie

Unknown said...

What a week, have no idea when do you push in some time for your lovely illustrations, by the way I loved reading about you "mug" or "cup" project, sounds very interesting! Happy PPF, Ruth

Neesie said...

Giggling in my bed first thing in the morning is a great start to the day, so thanks Trace.
I wrote a comment on my phone (which was quite lengthy) and whoosh it disappeared (Grr) but I was telling you about my theory!
I think all of the above is quite normal and's all the organised that are 'not normal' whatever normal is?
For instance, I put milk on the dogs biscuits yesterday instead of in my cuppa. All normal when you're doing two jobs at once and your heads away on another planet multi-tasking!
Anyway... gorgeous artwork and it's great to hear of all your projects coming to fruition.
Can't wait to see ;D
I'm heading back to my gin bottle so I'll love and leave you for today. Have a fabulous weekend
Happy PPF to you xoxo

PaintingWrite said...

Ah Tracey your posts always read like a Frank Spencer storyline (showing my age and possibly leaving you blank faced as it maybe didn't make it to the other side of the world in the 70s!) Is your so on Etsy? If course folk will want to buy prints of your gorgeous work and congrats on teaching in soul food-i didn't know you were doing that-seems to be a few online at buddies taking part in that this time round!

froebelsternchen said...

Sounds like it was a fantastic week .. as fantastic as this watercolor pieces are! Love your style you know!
Happy weekend!

Netty said...

Sounds like a very productive week Trace, even the leg licker has been productive. As always your drawings are inspirational, wishing you every success with your future classes. Happy PPF Annette x

Unknown said...

Yes you had a busy week. Remember to take time to rest as well and relax... Beautiful sketches and your facebook page looks really great. Great work Tracey. Big hugs from North.

BLOGitse said...

Your midnight poison looks like medicine - medicine for our eyes and minds. Amazing painting again!
I was reading about Community Thrive and Soul Food. Maybe I'll join too but I have to read again...65usd but on top of that classes - how much are they?
Also, there are groups - how to know which one or all to join?
hm...I need to go back and read again.
Have a relaxing weekend!

my blog - > BLOGitse

Linda Kunsman said...

wow Trace you sure have gotten much done! I too feel like I should get my rear in gear and spread my art a bit further but I am so intimidated by all the techy stuff. Your illustrations are just beautiful-you won't have any problems selling any of them! Cuppa's coming back -yay! I'll stay posted and def. will send you a photo or two:)

Unknown said...

you truly had me laughing, especially with the dog licking your leg!!! I have to say, your decision to get things done is phenomenal and makes me tired thinking about it all. It's amazing how painting can calm a person down.
Can't wait to see the start of the cups again.

Krisha said...

I really don't think you will have any problems selling your work, it's all gorgeous!

Organization is a fantasy!!! LOL I could spend all my time trying to organize, but it all falls away the instant I touch an art supply.....grin

Glad to hear your finished with treatments, it's all UP HILL from here!

Beth Niquette said...

You, dear Lady, are SO industrious! You are not only gifted artistically, but you are a wonderful writer. As always you inspire me to new heights.

I have a theory about your notebooks. I have such problems myself. I think it is because when I'm not looking--they grow legs and scuttle to where I can't see 'em.

Just sayin'. (grin)

sheila 77 said...

I so admire the way you can paint a water-coloured splashy painting but it still looks detailed and realistic and I love the way you use and merge the gorgeous clear splashy colours.
I especially like the last two, maybe partly because of the unusual shape and the way you have drawn the complex white flower.
Good luck with your relaunch of your Cuppa project.

Anonymous said...

I love reading your posts. I laugh and felt sad and felt frustrated and am glad to have you in my life!

Jo Murray said...

We all make promises to ourselves that are impossible to keep. One can only do so much....and, if it's a chore, there's nobody saying you MUST...other than yourself. Be happy you have your treatment behind you, AND a heap of people who just LOVE the way you write AND draw. No pressure, no expectations.

Giggles said...

First thought, "Chillax" and yes that is officially a dic..tionary word!
Too much pressure for a lady getting back on the treadmill of life!! Take a sticky note and promise yourself to do one thing each day! Or even part of one steps!! Prioritize in sequence of importance and all will be well. Never give up time for creating in lieu of boring administration crap!! Now give yourself a smack on the wrist for letting your brain even suggest people won't love and buy your art silly woman!!
Best of all enjoy... Love all your wonderful pen strokes with color... You rock my creative world!

Hugs Giggles

Rita said...

Talk about multi-tasking. Sounds like you're running circles around yourself--LOL! I can't get the picture of the turkey chasing your sweet furbaby around the yard out of my head. ;) Lovely work, as usual. Those perfume bottles have all been so wonderful.

Twist of Pink said...

Well, I'm exhausted from your week. Funny how I've never thought of "drawing" a cocktail. Hmmm. Love your work!

Christine said...

Lovely work Tracey, so glad to hear your treatment is finished.

TwinkleToes2day said...

Oh my giddy one, what a fine pickle you got yourself into! You do not have to keep allll the promises you made yourself, - just the ones that make you happy! The ones that make you FEEL alive! However, if you DO want to keep them all.....then.....what a silly billy for making so many! :p :p lolol
Love ya with hugs and bells on and wish you luck with the organising and sorting and notebook round up (make a lasso!) and if you need a proof reader, or test subject, then I'm your gal. Have a great day ((Hugs)) xox

Jo said...

That you are documenting and sharing your life with us.... is pretty brave and cool. and so are you.........

kat said...

Your art is lovely, especially that vase of pink flowers which are my favourites, beautiful! Take it easy and I agree just do what really makes you happy and keep well!

alarmcat said...

sounds like a busy week!! i'm heading over to your new Facebook page now...

Catharina Engberg said...

I get exhasted and smiling when reading your post. Thank you! Allways love to read them. Take care!

Ayala Art said...

Soul Food, yaaay! I want to watch your video! ♥ ♥ ♥

Seth said...

Your post definitely made me smile. You have some amazing plans!! Just take some deep breaths first and go at any pace that works for you!

Gloria j Zucaro said...

Hi Tracy, Love your art and post per usual, but please don't feel you must accomplish all at once, and also don't overstress yourself. You can break promises to yourself and even to us, your followers. Just enjoy your art, and don't feel the need to procrastinate by arranging all your tea cups with the handles facing North!

Lindsay said...

I'm not sure which one's my favorite... the perfume bottle or the cocktail... both have beautiful blended colors!

Bronson Hill Arts said...

Hope you find time to relax & heal, Tracey.

As for the organisation bit, I & a good friend have been "doing" all that rigmarole for several years,including a monthly meeting (okay, wine party). We are still tackling all of it. Unendingly.

Don't sweat it. It'll happen eventually!


Sirkka said...

Lovely colourful paintings!

Felicity said...

I love the mix : ink and watercolor, it is so attractive!

Sandra Busby said...

Oh my! I am exhausted just reading all that!! (By the way - you should check out my latest post, hehe ;0)...)
Anyway - I am dying to see the video you filmed but I can't find it! How can I see it? I had being on video too - my voice always sounds ridiculously high, like a 12 year old - I swear I don't sound like it in real life, at least I hope not!! Anyway - I don't know where to find the energy Tracey... All that caffeine maybe? You have had such a productive week! And such a gorgeous collection of paintings thrown in too... You put my own pathetic week to shame! ;0)

Anonymous said...

Wild turkeys are nasty. Poor pup, although that is who is probably moving your notebooks about. Glad you will be doing soul food. Nice little pic of you - finally a face to go with the funniness and talent. Just because you made all those promises doesn't mean you have to do them all at once. Ease in, or you will definitely be drawing more cocktails. xox

Tammie Lee said...

your paintings are charming as can be.

so glad you gave yourself time for them amongst all your thoughts and feelings about selling.

being an artist is one thing and facet or ourselves, being a business person is entirely different.

wishing you clarity and dreams come true.

so glad you are finishing the treatment... long journey indeed.

JKW said...

Good grief, I am so proud of you. Eyebrows.. .dang things. Mine fell out with E.coli food poisoning. They've come in 1/2 way. . .Yikes. I love the way you've displayed your art. Blessings, Janet, PPF

java diva said...

Oh my word, Tracey, you are hilarious!! I love reading your words as much as I love seeing your art!