Tuesday, 9 September 2014

Some Ugly Children...

One of my followers sent me an email over the weekend which pulled me up short
She said she often goes away from my blog feeling bad because the work is so polished
and she feels like she could never create such finished work
now I must say the thought of my blog making anyone feel bad about their work
or in any way at all is pretty bloody awful to me
so I decided to do a post showing some of the paintings currently on my desk
which all got stuck in the ugly child stage, or never quite came together
or just are doing my head in for various reasons

So let's open with my new kettle... which is gorgeous... all deep green and shiny
the painting not so much
going to take a couple of goes to do it justice I would think

This little sketch of the outgoing kettle was better than the new one
as an aside... this baby was called a whisper kettle
and was the greatest bit of mis labelling ever
as it sounded similar to a bomb going off in a toaster when it came to the boil
but despite hating this kettle with a passion that was a little unhealthy
the 3 minute sketch turned out better than the half hour I spent on the new beloved kettle
which is just how it goes sometimes...

This one doesn't look too bad
gorgeous tea and container, colour not quite there, but ok

until you see the whole page
yep... ink smudges all over the place, frame wonky and crap lettering
I smudged the ink with my sleeve... twice
then tried to fix it and just made the frame thing wonkier
then didn't put any thought into the lettering and used my normal chicken scrawl
and it happens to be in one of my favourite sketchbooks
no clue how I am ever going to fix it
it may stay stuck like this forever and never blossom into loveliness

another page in a different favourite sketchbook
that is all over the place like a dog's dinner is this one
that chicken at the bottom looks evil and is totally doing my head in
Phantom believes the chicken doesn't look evil
she believes it looks like a gangster bouncer chicken
not sure about that one, but fair enough I suppose
not to mention the smudgey paint and running colours

This one has been on my desk for months
and this is the second attempt as number one went into the bin quick smart
it is for a blogging friend called Carol to celebrate her getting some great medical results
the background was too bright so I tried to knock it back... not great
then the composition bothered me
so here is version number three

better composition, but a bit scared to put the paint down in case it turns on me
like it has the other two times
and of course here are the bloody deer heads
this is attempt number five
yep five 

I swear to you these things are sent to torture me
the minute I add paint it goes horribly wrong... scarily horribly
and all other versions have been consigned to the bin with a great sense of relief 
because then I don't have to face them

 then we have the cursed hydrangeas
I can't even tell you what number attempts these are
and these were the pieces I put my hand on in five minutes
there are so many drawings and paintings stuck in that ugly child stage it is scary
but just like Phantom who went through a dead ugly stage when she was little
but turned out rather gorgeous if I do say so myself
I have quite a soft spot for the duds and crap work
some of these will end up ok,others will come together nicely
but some will be forever rubbish... and that's ok
happy painting all...xx


Netty said...

I am totally a saddo as I love them all...........Annette x


Anonymous said...

well I love everything you do and your botched ones are still amazing!!

Linda Kunsman said...

I can agree with Laurie that even your botched ones (in your eyes) look pretty darn good to me!!! I may never be near as good as you, however your illustrations always inspire and encourage me to keep trying:) XO

Bev said...

Tracey it's sad that person feels that way ,but you worked hard to get to where you are with your art ,I love your work like so many others....and I'm still working hard to be as good as you are ,that's what we have to do ,keep sharing because you inspire me and I always feel good seeing your work.....and maybe she just expressed herself in the wrong way....
Luv ya xox

Unknown said...

I can totally understand what your follower meant.She was not sad about your awesome work.She was sad that it was taking her so long to reach your level.It's so very normal to feel doubtful and and feel a smidgen of self pity when you are struggling with something and see and start compating with the work of people who have mastered the art. Every body wants to be good at what they do, but we all want it to be superfast. Some of us give up after our initial failures, while some adamantly keep trying. I have to be honest, I have been tempted to be in the first category a number of times on account of crappy sketching, but I hope that I do not give up.End of sermon.
You on the other hand made my heart smile with your kindness. I have a soft spot for people with empathy and kindness and you go to my top ten list.:-)By the way your so called botched attempts look anything but botched to me.

sharon said...

Your botched works look pretty good to me, I only noticed things when it was pointed out. Also someone's botched work is a masterpiece to another and vice versa! I have had a failed painting snapped up with glee?! And what I thought was wonderful declared a mess by another. Hope your post made the email sender a bit happier, none of us are perfect all the time.

Belinda Basson said...

Ditto everything said above! Art is purely in the eye of the beholder! I say this as us artists are our harshest critics. I once visited a students house years after she painted a HUGE intricate silk painting along the lines of a Persian carpet and when I went to look at it, she said "see the mistake is still there?" well I was flawed! I can usually spot a problem area, but in all the business of this design, I could not spot a thing! Then she pointed out a tiny place she had made a "mistake" and I still could not see it. You see as the artist, it stays with you, the things that bother you. As the viewer, you enjoy it for what it is. We are all harshest on ourselves. I have had to learn to see it through others eyes and get over myself!

Jo Murray said...

Even your crook drawings are way ahead of my OK ones. But then...perhaps my talents lie somewhere else.

Margarita said...

Está bien esta muestra de sus errores, eso nos hace ver que todos nos equivocamos, que no todo es perfección.
¿Por qué ser tan duros con nosotros mismos? Mejor hecho que perfecto. O aquello otro de lo importante (e interesante, añado yo por mi cuenta) no es la meta, sino el camino. A eso me agarro yo. ¡Disfrutemos haciendo! Sí, disfrutemos incluso con nuestros pequeños engendros, ja, ja...

Abrazos, Tracy.

Unknown said...

the reason i follow your blog is because of the insight you give and the fact that you make me think outside the box. the drawings are just a bonus. i know that i come away with something every time i read the blog. and for the person who is not happy with her drawings....practice, practice, practice and enjoy the process. that's what i take from you.

HollyM said...

Yes, it's all been said above. I don't profess to be as good as you, but I really do know about all the not so good (learning process ) that come before the more satisfying ones.
I feel the comment was a bit of a backhanded comment resulting in making you, out of kind mess feel bad.
It is nice thought to see a few of your iffy pieces. It does show that creating really is about the process and that it does take work and practise.

TwinkleToes2day said...

You are a sweetheart. I am not naive enough to think that you never make mistakes or have 'off' days so I admit to a little perverse pleasure in seeing some of your 'duds' ;) Thank you for sharing them Tracey, they give me hope ((hugs)) xox

alarmcat said...

Thanks for showing your "ugly children." It's good to know that I'm not alone. I have stacks and boxes full of ugly children (a.k.a. scrap paper).

alarmcat said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Botched is still good in my book and I agree with Phantom that the chicken is a bouncer for sure. xox

Paula - Buenos Aires said...

Phantom knows what she is talking about. ;)
Even your ugly children are cute. :D
PS: do you speak Spanish? I just saw a comment in it. If Google translator doesn´t do the job, drop me a line. ;) :)

Krisha said...

Hi Tracey,
What a woman to show your ugly children, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder......except for the mobster chicken....LOL

It is always nice to know that all artist go through the many pains of getting it just "so".

Thanks for sharing, have a great week!

Debbie Nolan said...

Oh Tracey - I tend to think all your sketches are wonderful. Even if you say they are at that ugly stage...they are all real and that makes them wonderful. Thanks for sharing what you think might be the less than pretties in your file! Have a great day.

AM Zafaran said...

Loving all your work, especially the green kettle and the gangster bouncer chicken!! :-)

Kristin said...

I just want to say I found it selfish that she would say that to you. I am in no way anywhere near your awesomeness but it doesn't make me sad to see your work, but rather determined to keep trying and inspired. You worked hard to get your work to where you like it and if someone gets sad about it and are petty enough to try to make you feel bad for being awesome, well shame on them. They don't have to look at any of it, they don't have to make themselves feel bad. If thats how they feel, then so be it!! You shouldn't have to explain yourself, your art or your process to anyone because they can't handle seeing great work. That's their problem, not yours. You keep doing what you do because it makes YOU happy. And it happens to make me smile too, and my smile is not asking you to prove anything :)

Anonymous said...

Even ugly children are beautiful....I have several that are starting to pile up...thank you so much for the shout out for my new blog...that bright flower I used for my result post was an ugly child for a long time...but with a few more adds and some internet contrast I was happy!

Sandra Busby said...

Well all of these are better than mine! I actually really like the green kettle! I have sketchbooks which have some real gems but sit amongst some proper monsters, lol! But I suppose that's what sketching is all about :0)

Katie Jeanne said...

I wish my unpolished art looked this good. :)

Kristin said...

HEY! I just saw you on the Soul Food team! YAY! HOW amazing - it's gonna be a fun year ;) xoxo

VonnyK said...

Even your bad paintings are gorgeous to me and your posts always make my day. I'm with Phantom, chooky looks like a gangster bouncer chicken. Kinda like that look.

Jenn Jilks said...

I think people need to let go of their egos and laud the excellent work in others. We all have gifts and talents. I look at lovely work like yours and feel inspired to have fun!

Penny Lee StewArt said...

I love them all, with smudges, their looseness, the squiggly lines, they all seem painterly to me. Good job. We all have a different style, thankfully. I think your style is superb.

Quilt knit said...

Do not throw them away! Never throw them away! Send them to me!!!! I will give them a Great New Life!! You will never recognize them!!!
Oh my! How much fun they would be!!! Never throw them out.
So much richness to work with! The Diversity!