The Broccoli Chip Beverage ....

Some of you may be a bit too recent to remember the broccoli chip incident of 2012, but believe me it is the stuff of legend in our house and remains one of the defining moments in parenting joy.

In short broccoli chips are reminiscent of fish food filled, wet, old boots that have been baking in the sun for a couple of days and have provided a benchmark for the level of disgustingness of something ever since, but it would appear we have a new contender.

Sinus and I headed off to the liquor store, which is know as the bottl-o in these parts, to buy a celebratory beverage for the end of radiation.  I am no drinker... infact if you look up cheap drunk in the dictionary there is a little animation of me dancing on a table while singing eighties tunes, followed by a very unflattering collapse into a snoring, drooling mess. 

But glug glug woohoo tendencies aside, I do love all the pretty bottles and labels, and my eye was caught by this little vintage looking wonder... It had cloudy apple juice... which I love, plus maple.... which everyone loves right... and bourbon... which I couldn't really remember drinking in the last 20 years or so, but I had fond college memories of bourbon... I think.... some of those details are a tad fuzzy. The clincher was that it was called the rambler, which seemed to be talking directly to me and was totally appropriate as I am four paragraphs in and haven't gotten to the point yet... 

Now I am sure there are some people out there who think this stuff is like the nectar of the gods, and maybe my lack of drinking chops contributed, but this is impressively awful... one taste and my throat slammed shut, my eyes did a funny dance and I had trouble catching my breath. Phantom looked suitable horrified and concerned through her giggles and snorts, which is why she is such a magnificent daughter, but Sinus of course was disbelieving of my theatrics, immediately decided he needed a taste. 

Just as he got the drink to his lips, I found I was able to breathe again and managed to gasp out two words... broccoli chips... It was too late though and poor Sinus had taken a gulp, and I must say he made my theatrics look reserved, especially as he added a slight hopping and nose pinching manoeuvre which I had never seen before. The tongue scrubbing and complaining that ensued for the next few hours was truly broccoli chip worthy and we now have rambler as a beverage equivalent descriptor and broccoli chip can be reserved as the food benchmark from this day forward

Of course I needed to immortalise this new addition to our family lexicon, and now it has been done I can get back to painting up the view from the bedroom window... Nothing remotely broccoli chip or rambler about that...

Happy painting all...xx

The Numbers ...

The last 10 months or so in numbers looks a bit like this

1 mammogram

4 ultrasounds

6 biopsies

Four ct scans

I bone scan

Four specialist doctors

ten tattoos

And 5 squillion blood tests

In fact it is a miracle I have any blood left when I think of it

2 operations

16 rounds of chemo

31 jabs accessing my cath port thingy

42 doctors appointments

And so many amazing caring nurses that I couldn't count them

3 radiation planning sessions

with impressive dismounts

I have been sneezed on by the dog 345 times

And been trapped and unable to escape his toxic farts 23 times

There have been 27 doses of radiation

 and 12 or so X-rays

which in combination with the radiation has made me glow ever so slightly

I have waited in waiting rooms for the equivalent of 2 years

And taken more medication than I knew existed in the western world

At least 7698 people have examined, drawn on, cut into, and generally played with poor lefty

I lost and regained my hair four times

Lost 726 eyelashes

Ok maybe not but those suckers turned up everywhere

Lost 2 eyebrows

And gained back one and a half so far

Have cried more times than I can count

And laughed more often than I would have expected

And been laughed at a lot more times than was possibly warranted

Have eaten 5324 slices of Vegemite toast

And drunk 8265 smoothies

Slept for 634000 hours

Watched 5 million hours of TV

Read 9870 trashy magazines

Dreamt of George Clooney more times than I can count

And chocolate twice more than George

And George and chocolate together three more times than that

 I have received a huge box full of cards and letters

Emails, gifts and paintings

Extraordinary virtual tea parties, not to mention actual tea

And chocolate...

I have been inundated with incredible positivity

And people have taken the time to share their own cancer stories with me

To support and care for me in ways that have made me cry a river of tears

at the sheer generosity of spirit that has surrounded me through all this

I have not had one day when I didn't feel cared for and nurtured

Which means for the last 300 days or so 

I have felt so grateful to have such an amazing circle of people holding me up

It is actually pretty easy to look past the awful when you have that sort of support

There are still a few numbers left to deal with

There are years of appointments, port flushes , scans and medication

But from next Monday night when I have my last radiation session I enter a new phase

When life will start to half resemble what it used to be

And I can embark on my new normal which is very cool

and I am feeling pretty overwhelmed by just how freaking cool my friends are

Being so close to the end of the of the crap stuff has made me sit and assess

Just how lucky I have been through this, and how ready I am for this phase to be done

So I feel impatient to get moving forward

To start getting stronger and to get back to being creative daily

So to help me along with that I joined Sketchbook Skool

And these pages are my start

It has felt wonderful to get my daily drawing habit going again

But there is one last, and very important number... 22

22 years ago today I married Sinus man and he is still making me laugh and taking care of me

It has been quite the ride... 

I love you Matt ....xx

mixing it up and paying it forward ...

I am being well and truly zapped by radiation therapy at the moment

Which is having some unexpected consequences

The weirdest being that Mushu the wonder mutt has become suspiciously affectionate

hanging around, licking and sniffing me when I get home from being cooked

I am starting to think I have the whiff of BBQ about me and smell delicious or something

Because he definitely licks his chops an unseemly amount for an hour or two after I get in

I am living in terror of the day Sinus forgets to feed him before going to work

As I am half expecting to wake up and find him attempting to gnaw on poor lefty out of hunger

I have also developed another fixation with mixers

Now I have no idea why I get fixated on certain kitchen gadgets

And my treasured blue kitchen aide has certainly not been getting much use lately

But it started with trying to remember different mixers I have known

As shown on the top page from my sketchbook

It shows the good old rotary beater, and various hand mixers

which I have blown up with scary regularity, plus my blue kitchen aide

and a rather dodgy drawing of my mother's old mixer

My memory may be getting slightly zapped as well if that sketch is anything to go by

It isn't quite right.... Anyway that led to some more sketches of hand mixers

Which I wished I owned because they are available in such gorgeous colours

And an outline which hasn't been touched yet

So yet another unfinished work to add to the list

Perhaps the one in the sketchbook needs to be a different colour

Getting a tad sick of the blue!

Also on the list of slightly unexpected consequences is need to consume vast quantities of chocolate

Well maybe vast is an exaggeration but lots

After a very long 7 months of chocolate tasting like the bottom of a bird cage

It is like nectar on my sore throat which is, in an ironic twist

Now itself feeling like the bottom of a bird cage due to it being thoroughly zapped

In celebration of the chocolates wonderful ness of my days

I also painted up a bit of a mash up of the ridiculously amazing Theo's chocolate

That Marji sent me.... It is seriously amazing

Like the crack of the chocolate world and it had me at that first delicious mouthful

And it has been wonderful training and is getting me into shape chocolate eating wise

In preparation for my favourite celebration of the year.... Easter.... 

Hello bunnies and eggs and maltesers... Of how I have missed you all 

while we are on the subject of Marji... she is having a pay it forward art giveaway on her blog

and I am on the list to receive something from her.... which makes me very excited

and as part of the deal I have to pay it forward as well

so ....

* Pay It Forward Art-making Project for 2014 *

I promise to make a small work of art for the first five people who comment on this post and say "YES, I want in". A 'like' alone is not enough of a commitment, nor is a comment about thinking Pay It Forward is a great idea.

You must in turn post this as your status update and make something for the first five who comment on your status.

The rules are simple:
– It has to be your work, made by you, and the recipient must receive it before 2014 ends.
– It can be anything art-based: a drawing/illustration or a conceptual work of art, a photograph, a knitted item, cross-stitch, paper maché – or anything in between.

I'm paying this forward thanks to Marji Thompson.  Yes, you can be on each other's pay it forward lists.

First five, GO!

PS. It doesn't matter if you aren't an artist, try something out, google/ YouTube how to make stuff, step out of those boundaries.